In Memory of Dan Fogelberg

I subbed today at the middle school and when I got my class settled on their task, I got on line to check my email and check the headlines. I was stunned to read that folk-rock singer and songwriter Dan Fogelberg passed away on Sunday morning from prostate cancer. He was 56.

I was surprised how shaken I was about it.

Dan Fogelberg (DF) was pretty popular back in the 70's and 80's. He had a number of hits and put out some great music. A friend that worked at a record store introduced me to his music when he gave me DF first album, "Home Free." I was swept away with its very first cords on "To the Morning" and stirred with the lyrics of the closing song, "The River."

Shortly after receiving the album DF came to town and a couple of friends and I went to hear him. It was a wonderful evening of folk and rock with his back-up band "Fools Gold." His closing song "There's a Place in the World for a Gambler" got the entire crowd singing and we sang the song all the way home.

His music served as an essential part of my life's soundtrack. When I graduated and hit the road with those same dear friends for a month, traveling down the east coast, we wore out his tapes. When I moved into the dorm on campus, it was the music of Fogelberg that filled our room. When a dear friend was in a bad place and couldn't see it, it was DF song "As the Raven Flies" that I would play around him.

I don't know what place his life was in when he died, whether he had a faith in Christ or not, but in some of his songs there was a longing for more, a soul searching for answers. When he released his album "Nether Lands," the first song caused several of us to wonder if maybe, just maybe, he had found Christ:

High on this mountain
The clouds down below
I'm feeling so strong and alive
From this rocky perch
I'll continue to search
For the wind and the snow and the sky
Oh I want a lover and I want some friends
And I want to live in the sun
And I want to do all the things that I never have done
Sunny bright mornings and pale moonlit nights
Keep me from feeling alone
Now I'm learning to fly and this freedom is like
Nothing that I've ever known
Oh I've seen the bottom and I've been on top
But mostly I've lived in between
And where do you go when you get to the end of your dream
Off in the Nether Lands I heard the sound
Like the beating of heavenly wings
And deep in my brain I can hear a refrain
Of my soul as she rises and sings
Anthems to glory and anthems to love
And hymns filled with earthly delight
Like the songs that the darkness composes to worship the light
Once in a vision I came on some woods
And stood at a fork in the road
My choices were clear yet I froze with the fear
Of not knowing which way to go
Oh, one road was simple acceptance of life
The other road offered sweet peace
When I made my decision
My vision became my release

That song still makes my soul soar when I listen to it and, whether or not it was a result of the discovering of Christ in his life, it certainly made me sing it in praise to my Lord!

I wrote my wife this morning and told her I lost a dear friend yesterday. I hope that in his struggle to live, that he came to meet Christ. Believing that all good things come from God, I believe that Dan Fogelberg's music was a gift from God. It will always touch me and fill me with wonderful and sad memories. But I hope that, as his music lives on, that God will us it for His Glory and touch another soul who is searching for the Nether Lands.

Thank you Dan for touching my life with your music.



Check out his website at http://www.danfogelberg.com/news.html

From the mid 70's

From 2003

Saturday morning in bed

I've been lying in bed for the last hour listening to Will Ackerman on my computer trying to decide if I want to get up or not. It's probably time but I look outside and it's gray and breezy and I'm sure it's chilly. Still, I wonder if I should get up, get dressed and take my dog for a walk in the woods down the road.

I have a strange feeling of disconnect today. Actually, I've had it for several days now. I've had this deep internal yearning to be someplace else, far away, deep in the woods or on top of a mountain, someplace secluded and private. I find myself watching the Travel Channel, shows about Alaska, Ireland, Scotland, Yellowstone, the Grand Canyon, and my heart stirs and my mind says, "I want to be there." Though part of my feeling is because I am enraptured with those places and want to visit them, my mood now has to do with the idea that, if I'm not here, but there, then I don't have to deal with the stuff that's here.

But I know that, as much as I would like to be there - someplace else, it wouldn't be long before I started to feel this way again and long to be back over here. The reason? Because where ever I may go, there I am and I am the reason that I feel this disconnect. It has more to do with me and my emotional reaction to the season (Christmas and Winter) of busyness and gray, my soon to be 50th birthday, and some other things, that cause me to have this stirring of being "there" than "here".

My other choice is just to stay in bed for the rest of the day - which won't work because I have a lovely wife and daughter at home that won't let me stay in bed. They will get me up and get me to do something because that is what I need to do. Climbing mountains or walking in the woods can't take place while in your bed.

I think I'll get up.

My Rules for Christmas

My wife and I have this running "discussion" every year around the end of October, beginning of November, about when we can officially prepare for and celebrate the Christmas season. She wants to take out the decorations a week or two before Thanksgiving and start playing Christmas music. I, on the other hand, believe you should wait until after Thanksgiving. I am really resistant to doing the "Christmasy" thing too early. For some reason it really bothers me that we tend to go from Halloween to Christmas without paying much respect to the Thanksgiving season.

This whole issue has frustrated me to such a point that some years back I put together my list of rules for Christmas. Mind you, these are my rules that no one seems to want to follow - at least some of them, as you will see - but I always pull them out and remind my wife of my rules as I start pulling down Christmas decoration boxes from the attic. This year I was reminding her of my rules the weekend before Thanksgiving, as I was putting up the four Christmas trees in our house! As I said, they're my rules that aren't necessarily embraced by many. But they should be!

Rule #1 - No Christmas ornaments on display or sold in stores until the week of Thanksgiving.

Is it me or did you notice how early the stores got the move on Christmas this year? It's disconcerting to walk through a store and see costumes of witches and monster and Halloween decorations in one aisle and angels, Santa Claus and Christmas decorations in the next. It really messes up my anticipation for Christmas.

Rule #2 - No Christmas decorations up in and around homes until after Thanksgiving.

What ever happened to Thanksgiving? I don't see any turkeys or pilgrims or Native Americans smiling out in the yard, no little ships hanging from the trees, no giant turkey drumstick on the top of roofs. It was nice to come home after Thanksgiving and find that the neighbors down the street finally took down their Halloween blowups off the lawn. I don't know but maybe witches, goblins and skeletons hold more significance than a time for giving thanks and the Christ Child. At least most jobs and schools are giving you the day before Thanksgiving off. That seems right, considering that, next to Christmas it is the most traveled few days in visiting family and friends.

Rule #3 - Sometime during the Christmas season there needs to be several days when the weather is colder than 40 degrees. Somewhere during the month of December, it would be wonderful it happened a few days before Christmas, that a light dusting of snow were to take place.

There is something just not normal when you get to this time of the year and the average temperature is hovering around the 60's or higher. Don't get me wrong, I'm not looking for drifts of snow or temps in the teens or twenties. I moved south from the north impart to get away from that kind of stuff. I just want a couple of days when you can go out, throw a snowball, make a snowman and snow angle, and watch the snow light up as it gently falls over the outside Christmas lights. Just a gentle reminder that we are, in fact, in the season of winter.

Rule #4 - Movies like "Christmas Carol", "It's a Wonderful Life", and "A White Christmas" should be required viewing during the Christmas season. Add to those movies such TV specials like "A Charlie Brown Christmas", "The Grinch that Stole Christmas", and "I Wish for Wings that Fly". When these are on, the family should be gathered, popcorn popped and the fire going, all together watching as a family.

I admit that I become a big sap for Hallmark movies made for Christmas. I snuggle in with my wife and we are reminded how easy it is to take things for granted, how important family and friends are, and that "'tis the season" is only for the child at heart, not grumpy, greedy people.

Rule #5 - Everyone should stand by the mall Christmas Tree or the moving Christmas decorations and watch the little children's reactions. They are always the same, they all have a gleam in their eyes, a smile on their faces, and a look of wonder at what ever they see. And, if you get lucky, no, if you are blessed, you'll catch that same wonder in the face of an adult or two, maybe it might even be you!

Rule #6 - Everyone should sing at least one Christmas song each day through Christmas Day. Solos are allowed and are to be applauded. Four part harmonies are nice but not required. At least one verse. Grab a partner and do a duet. Be spontaneous. Be bold. Be vocal.

Rule #7 - Along with the gifts that we give to our family and friends, we should also give them the gift of blessing. Words have far greater value and impact than material things. A blessing is more than a wish, a blessing involves hope, it involves encouragement, it involves knowing a little bit about that person's soul, it involves you being involved with that person in a deeper way than with just giving a material gift. It involves being open to let that person become a part of your life. Interestingly, as you bless you will be blessed. Strange how that works but it's true.

Rule #8 - It's OK, in fact, it's encouraged that, in the mix of buying Christmas cards, that we should sit down and create a few of our own cards. Limit your use of the computer generated kind. Let the paint and crayons and markers fly! Use stick figures, experiment with your colors, be expressive, be funny, be serious, but above all, be real! And be sure you mail it.

Rule #9 - Last but most importantly, forget not what this season is all about. It's not just about a child being born in a manger, angels singing, shepherds and magi kneeling. It's about a Holy God having compassion on a sinful and fallen people and becoming one of us so that, instead of condemnation and emptiness, we could experience grace and peace and communion and joy and hope and love and purpose and...well, you get the point.

"The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood. We saw the glory with our own eyes, the one-of-a-kind glory, like Father, like Son, generous inside and out, true from start to finish."

(John 1:14, the Message Bible)

Christmas is about a Savior on the cross in our place, bearing our failures and, finally, standing before God as our Champion. our Intercessor, our Strength. He is, indeed, our "indescribable gift!"

"For a child has been born - for us! The gift of a son - for us! He'll take over the running of the world. His names will be: Amazing Counselor, Strong God, Eternal Father, Prince of Wholeness. His ruling authority will grow, and there'll be no limits to the wholeness He brings."

(Isaiah 9:6-7, the Message Bible)

To all of you who read this blog, family, friends, strangers, may these next several weeks be a time of great joy. May you grow deeper in your faith, wider in your compassion and love for others, climb higher in your pilgrimage of life, and become firmer in your hope and peace. And, above all, may you be touched by the Grace of God this season and always!

A Gathering of the Elders, part 1

On October 15-17 my Dad, my youngest brother, Bruce, my son Jonathan and I gathered in the mountains of west North Carolina for "guy time." My middle brother was unable to attend because of work but also because he was trying to give birth to stones. Unfortunately, it was more than a passing fancy for him! His son, Chris, was in school, as was Bruce's two sons, Adam and Jake. So it was just the four of us.

The purpose of our "guy time" was to hang out, do some hiking and kayaking. Being that we no longer all live within an hours drive of each other (I being close to 7 hours away), we wanted to just strengthen the bonds that remain. So we rented a cabin near the Nantahala river, between Waynesville and Murphy, NC, which is about 4 hours from Huntsville and Charlotte.

The place we stayed was, at best, in poor condition. We should have moved out the moment we walked in but, having emptied everything from our cars and having our eyes finally adjust to the darkness within the house (poor lighting), it was too late. The area where the cabin was located was beautiful and our first day was filled with sunlight and fall warmth. But the cabin was disappointing.


We had arrived a little before lunch time so we went to check out the whitewater place that we were renting from (Paddle Inn - highly recommend - very reasonable prices and great service).
We were originally going to do a raft together but ended up deciding we were going to do individual duckies (inflatable kayaks - I had my own boat and was eager to show off my skill). My biggest worry was my Dad, who, though has done a lot of canoing up until several years ago, had never done "kayaking." The lady who walked us through everything, Mama Wilson (I believe that is her last name) was one of a kind, a jewel of a lady and a devout Christian. My dad, jokingly, I think, mentioned having pains in his chest, to which she instantly placed her hands on his chest, rebuked the pains and asked for God's healing and protection. There was power in her words, folks.

We headed from there to do some hiking, albeit nothing long or strenuous. We did hike the Appalachian Trail (well, we walked 5 feet on a bridge and then back). We saw one of the waterfalls that is right after the whitewater run we would be taking on Tuesday. "This is one run you don't want to take. It's a class five with lots of sharp rocks," they said. When we saw it from a distance, it didn't look so bad.

However, when we saw it up close, we decided to heed their warning!









We then ckecked out the last rapid on the route, a class 3. We stood around and watched kayak's, rafts and duckies go through for about 30 minutes. It looked ... interesting, fun, exhilarating and wet. What we didn't realize then but would find out quickly the next day was just how cold 47 degree water really is! (That's not us on the right.)


When we could watch no longer, we headed home but took a detour and headed up one of the mountains by car. The leaves were beautiful, even if they still had a couple of more weeks to turn colors. We stopped and enjoyed several falls along the way and just talked. I think already we knew we were going to have a good time just hanging together, telling stories, insulting one another and just sharing.

We finally headed back down the mountain and headed back to our cabin. Supper time was upon us and we were hungry. We ate like kings and then sat around the table and played Rook for several hours. As the late hours closed in on us, and victory had been snatched from the jaws of defeat in a heated game (Dad and I against Bruce and Jonathan), we opened the Sacred Scroll and closed the night with offering thanks to the Sure Right Hand. For the One who blessed us that first day together was about to give us one wild day the next!

Death

This has been a tough last several days. I still have another one to go. I have had two deaths in my church in the last few days. One was an older woman who had been a member of my church for over 50 years. Her health had deteriorated over the last several months and she was unhappy with her life as a result. She had been a Christian for all of her adult life, as far as I know. Her funeral was last Thursday.

The other was a man of 40 who, in essence, had drunk so much that it had finally taken its toll and over the last month or so his health took a turn for the worse. However, I can say with all confidence that this man had, in the last couple of weeks, just before the bottom dropped out on his health, had come to accept Christ into his life, knowing that he could no longer control his life and that he needed Christ to find emotional and soul healing. His funeral if tomorrow.

Of all the duties that I have as a pastor, helping families deal with death is the hardest and the most uncomfortable for me. I feel as if I am walking on pins and needles. I worry about what to say, or not to say. I worry about how involved I should be with the family, what kind of service is appropriate, if I might mess up during the service, of doing anything that would add additional discomfort to an already unbearable situation to family and friends. One hour spent in ministering in this situation is the most exhausting to me. And yet I realize it is nothing compared to what the family is going through.

I know all the things that I should do when serving in this very important role. Above all I know that it's not about me. It's about connecting Christ with those who are grieving and hurting. I know that Christ has an amazing way of revealing himself in the midst of our grief and sadness. I serve simply as a vessel, a servant of his to his people who are hurting.

Still, I feel so much out of my element. But those families are so gracious, so appreciative, even so caring. There has been such a Christ-likeness in them towards me, even in the midst of their own struggles. I have left those families more blessed that I did going in. I feel so much out of my element, but I feel so much in Christ's.